Pandemic Miracles..if only...

In the pre-dawn stillness, the pull to write was strong. Words poured into my heart as sleep fled in the face of such light. The ever-present personal hesitancy of not knowing what would evolve in this experience, was replaced by the desire to be obedient in the use of His gift of language to bless others, and myself. In the darkness I heard Him and quietly made my way downstairs and began to write.

I had awoken from a vivid dream about my friend Lynne Bentley. She is currently serving with her sweetheart as companion in the Presidency of the Chile Santiago North Mission. She has been on my mind a lot recently as I have watched them dig deep into their faith and lead their precious missionaries through circumstances no one could have imagined two years ago. You see their call was changed from California to Chile, just prior to their departure. No one was more surprised than this powerhouse couple. Yet in obedience, faith, and strength in the Lord, and standing shoulder to shoulder with her best friend, she has taken on every challenge before her. Two months and 5 days ago I followed the Lord's direction, and feeling a great urgency, I put together a package of home baked goodies and an unusual print I stumbled across of the Savior's hand holding the gloved hand of a physician. I knew immediately it was for President Bentley, formerly Doctor Bentley, who was now ministering to the spiritual bodies of those he was called to serve in Chile. Within  days of shipping my little package, I was surprised I hadn't heard from Lynne. We began to message and I told her what I had done. She hadn't received the packaged and assured me that my offering and subsequent messaging came at the perfect moment. She knew her prayers had been answered, she knew her Heavenly Father, and His Son, were aware of her and her needs in that moment. I was stunned, as I often am when I think something was my idea, only to take a step back and see the Lord's Perfect Plan working. 

I was however more focused on why the delivery was hung up in customs, especially since a previous package just about six weeks earlier arrived to her within two days of my shipping it. And so for two months now I have been fighting with FedEx to get the package delivered, to no avail. It is exactly where it has been, undelivered, for these last two months. As I came out of the dream this morning, I wondered at it's meaning. I recalled in my dream, that I was with Lynne, in Chile, and I was delighted to be helping her prepare for the visiting authority, who was coming to minister to her and President Bentley and their precious missionaries. We were busy making sure everything was ready, and my heart was so happy to be assisting her. 

Then this morning as I was walking through the dark to my computer, suddenly my mind was filled with His light and the meaning was clear. His miracle had been delivered two months ago! It wasn't in the now-moldy sweet bread inside the package. It wasn't the painting that I knew wasn't for President Bentley. (I remembered explaining in the accompanying note that I wasn't sure who it was for, but that President & Sis Bentley would know.) In the very moment Lynne first knew about the package, she had her miracle. She didn't need the package, just the moment she knew her prayers had been answered. That was His miracle for her. He had heard her pleas, He had provided a miracle for her to know He had heard her.

Yet in these last two months I have been on so many phone calls, pursuing the delivery, completely missing the miracle that was right in front of me. Lynne had told me that first conversation, that just knowing the Lord was aware of her was all she needed in that sacred moment. And so this morning I am repenting of trying to make the miracle happen, when it had already been made manifest to the one who needed it, and the one who recognized the true miracle in the very moment the Lord delivered that miracle to Lynne.

So just ignore me over here thinking I know what the true intent of that experience was. I know the Lord has a good sense of humor when it comes to me. Stay calm and carry on. He's got this! And when I get out of His way, He kindly shows me His Perfect Plan. And I get better at repenting!

I have learned that years ago as my memories of my sexual abuse came to light, there were many who ridiculed me because they didn't believe my truth. As I healed I took comfort in knowing Heavenly Father & my Elder Brother Jesus Christ, knew the truth. I also came to know truth is not dependent on someone's belief of it, truth always stands alone. And I realize now, amidst the chaos of the world, again truth stands unmarred, alone, and eternal. We may not have the full understanding of what is true about this pandemic now, but in that day when all truth is revealed to all people, we will see His Perfect Plan unfold. I realized recently, this simple act of faith, has for me, brought early, undeniable peace. I didn't fully understand why I was given such a gift of peace when literally the world was falling apart around me. But throughout these last five months, even when I was criticized and ridiculed for recognizing truth, I knew peace. I still know peace, and I am grateful for that gift.

My list of Pandemic blessings is growing. I love to see the Lord's hand in my life. I love to #HearHim. Hearing Him in the chaos of our new 'abnormal' because I am determined to grow my list has been such a joy. The latest one came in the life-altering broken leg of my grandson Paul, in his first football game of his high school experience. All the things that happened to line up perfectly for him to receive the very best care possible. Not the least of which is the Pandemic blessing of both parents working from home who can adjust their schedules to care for him as he is immobile for this first week. The many prayers that were answered before our eyes, as this horrific drama unfolded. And then yesterday, because of the Pandemic, I am not working (because of the dismantling of my industry during this chaotic time) and was able to take Kylee to her Doctor appointment. Suddenly, and quite unexpectedly, I was able to feel her little Princess move for the first time! Oh what joy! I couldn't contain my excitement and may or may not have screamed out loud! I am still in awe of her existence. I never expected to have another grand daughter! 

And so it goes, miracles everywhere, if only I open my eyes and remember how much He loves me! If only I remember to look for His Hand in my daily life. If only I continue to acknowledge, and give thanks for His miracles, I will continue to #HearHim. He lives!  He loves!  He blesses! He guides! He protects! He answers every prayer, very often through others, and in His timing! God is Good!

The Lost Doll

Last Friday we headed out for an overnight stay to celebrate our 38 years of marriage. We arrived with a couple of hours to kill, so opted for some outlet shopping. We parked near the most likely stores we would visit and began. We had been on this seemingly spontaneous and rather random adventure for about an hour, when we discovered a little Frozen doll on the ground. Clark picked it up and I noticed it still had it's tag on it, so we assumed she had just been purchased. We continued on, passing up one of the stores I thought for sure we would go in to.

Then we realized there was a little girl ahead of us crying, probably about three or four years old. Occasionally she would stop and look at her knee. As the crowd kept moving around her I suddenly realized she was alone!

Still following her closely, I passed one store who was restricting numbers of shoppers I quickly said to the employee standing at the door, "Call Security, she's alone! Please call security quickly!" I realized I couldn't wait for security to arrive-I had to act NOW, I walked faster catching up to her and bending down I said, "Did you hurt yourself?" She said yes and I asked where is your Mom? She began to cry harder and said "I don't know." Clark held out the discarded doll and I asked her if it was hers, she looked confused and then looked at the empty bag she was carrying. And we all knew it was hers. I recognized the store it had come from, and thought to myself...hmmm that was one of the stores we passed that I thought I had wanted to go into...

I said "Come with me I think I know where your Mommy is" I turned around and we headed back- as I took her hand and made small talk with her. Suddenly I looked up and a very frantic woman was rushing towards us. She was obviously terrified, and embarrassed, and her tone was ready to give her daughter a total scolding, so I said to my little charge, "She's not mad at you, she's just very scared."

And that was all it took as this Mom folded her little girl into her arms and the damn of tears broke. She cuddled her daughter as tears streamed down her face. Then she looked at me and said, "Oh my gosh you are my angel today, thank you!" over and over as the tears continued to fall. 

We both were kinda quiet as we walked away and then suddenly it hit us both at the same time, and we both said, "Apparently we were meant to be here for this little family today." While we thought we'd made this random decision, we had picked one store to go into, and suddenly we could see that everything we had done in those preceding hours lined up perfectly for us to be present to step into a terrifying, and potentially dangerous situation, literally becoming instruments in His hands.

We were His hands in those few moments.
He knew where we'd be and when.
He was also watching out for that little girl.
He was also answering fear-filled prayers of her Mother & Grandmother.

We quietly walked the remainder of the stores as we both pondered what had just happened. I could relate, I think losing a child in a public place is every parents worst nightmare. I thought back to the time we were in a Hotel with our Texas Mosses and Kenton ran ahead and jumped into the elevator as it closed. He was alone and we had no idea which floor he would get out on. I knew exactly what I had to do as I sprinted up one side of the building stairs and stuck my head out the stairwell door on every floor, until i reached the top floor...which was ours. He apparently knew which floor we were on and had even gone to our room and was found by a neighbor as Kenton knocking on our door-alone. And decided to stay with him til someone came!
I had been given a warning through a very vivid dream the night before and had been sick about the thought of losing Kenton. And while I couldn't have prevented his actions, I was prepared to think clearly about the plan of what I needed to do. And so I could act immediately.

This experience has continued to press upon my heart. I doubt I'll ever forget it. But again I marvel that we can be instruments in His hands whenever He needs us. I am always amazed when it happens though. It was such a simple thing. A simple kindness. But in comparison it may well have been the most important thing to that Mommy that day. 
And it may have been the most important thing that day for me too. 

We often talk about how we "Hear Him" and hearing Him does come in many different ways, the fact that we continue to try to Hear Him is very significant. Within 24 hours of this experience Clark then heard two divine directives about something completely new to us. He was listening. And He heard Him. What if we hadn't had the little girl experience, would Clark have been as willing to Hear Him? I'd like to think so, but we'll never know. But we do know that as we prepare ourselves to hear Him and then act upon these experiences we are blessed with more. 

#Godisgood
#HearHim
#HappyAnniversarytous
#Iamproudofus
#Thejourneycontinues