As a family we accepted Pres Jones challenge to pray for other Stake members who are struggling, and to "let virtue garnish our thoughts unceasingly."
"If there is anything virtuous, lovely or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things." 13th Article of Faith
He admonished us to use our collective monthly fast towards this end, and as we sought to keep our minds and lives virtuous this week, he promised we would see the Lords blessings and power manifest in our lives.
To our delight Bryce accompanied us to church last week on our fast Sunday. However after the Sacrament he leaned over to me and said, "My blood sugar is crashing can you please take me home." I'll admit initially that snarky little voice in my head said..."yeah right!"
But drawing upon my promise to the Lord, we headed to the car. I didn't say anything. Then Bryce quietly said, "I tried to fast this morning...." I gripped the steering wheel tighter as this truth entered my heart. He tried to fast. I responded quietly, "Maybe it's a little premature for that just yet, until you get your diabetes under control. However I am confident the Lord will bless you for your effort."
And so our days have passed, as Lehi said, "like unto a dream." I often feel drained from the emotional roller coaster that my life seems to be. But taking one moment at a time, leaning into the love and strength of the Lord and those who continue to pray with us, I am amazed at the blessings and power that has come into our lives this week.
We continued to give Bryce his space, and I focused on the Lord. Bryce seemed to really be struggling still and very non-emotional about everything. On Monday about noon he mentioned he was really struggling with his dark thoughts. Again my prayer was "Lord what would Thou have me to do?" His answer filtered gently into my mind,
"Ask your Spirit Squad to pray specifically that Bryce can have relief from his dark thoughts and know- and do- what he can to feel the love around him, and My Spirit."
So between work calls I shot off a text to my "Spirit Squad" (now before anyone takes offense- in the heat of the moment and under the guidance of the Spirit I may or may not invite each of you every time. I love that so many of you tell me you continue to pray for us. Believe me please when I say there is no way we'd be where we are today without your prayers!)
A little while later I came out of my office to check on Bryce...he was gone. So with a nearly constant prayer in my head I went back to work. Almost an hour later (about two hours after the text went out) he opened my office door and smiled at me. Stunned I just basked in the light of his smile, then he said, "Were you looking for me?" I nodded and he went on, "I went downstairs and was reading my scriptures, and I feel so much better."
And with another smile he walked out of my office. I was stunned, but so grateful!
Cheers for my Spirit Squad.
A day later I was feeling pretty bugged at how messy my kitchen was, and how he never cleaned up after himself....my stove was a mess, I could track him through the house by the messes he left. So that snarky voice in my head (I think we may actually be related...) began to whine to the Lord...."What would Thou have me to do?" Let's just say...in a tone me and my snarky voice would recognize I heard.."If you are this bugged about your kitchen...clean it yourself, silently." So I accepted His will, and began to plan on spending the evening cleaning...silently of course. And then after work I came out of my office to an immaculate kitchen, dishwasher running and all! Stunned I glanced at Bryce, and he grinned sheepishly.
Yet another miracle that would never have happened without that directive from the Lord.
And slowly over these last few days we have literally watched the Spirit surround him. He told us he had been very conscious of all he thought, watched and listened to in obedience to Pres Jones challenge. He began to smile more, he became so much more helpful. Often anticipating my needs before I had a chance to verbalize them. We talked and laughed. We prayed and shared and cried. At one point I said to him, "Who are you and whatever you have done with my son...I am totally ok with." He laughed out loud at that one!
We had a really long talk last night and he shared how he's noticed such a difference as we had backed off (I confessed that was not my idea...it was a clear directive from the Lord.)
He said there were days when he was very afraid of us coming downstairs to force him to get out and find a job.Or he had worried that we'd be mad he really wasn't doing anything all day. And then this week he slowly realized that the Spirit was more abundant around him, and that it was totally his decision that it was time to get back to work. He wasn't doing it to please us, he totally owned his changes. He says this whole new way of parenting has helped him make some very important decisions. Today he wanted to actively participate in some family things, he has amazed me at how helpful he is being. He has even cooked dinner twice this week.
Finally this evening I caught myself thinking it was Saturday today...and then it hit me...I had enjoyed these last few days so much because nearly all of my normal Bryce-stress was gone! And I still had another two days of weekend with him! My heart soared. When he came upstairs I took him in a hug, and told him some of the joy he'd brought me, and how proud of him I was. He's such a delight, I feel drawn to be with him- like a moth to the porch light on a summers eve.
And so I have seen exactly as Pres Jones had promised...blessings and power in our lives as we have prayed for others and sought virtue! Our little piece of Heaven here under the guiding influence of His Spirit feels just like the haven we wanted it to become. And now as the evening shadows fall please know I will continue to pray for each of us, a prayer of gratitude for your goodness and love, a prayer of comfort and peace as we each navigate these treacherous waters of mortality. May we each lift one another and be gentle and kind to those around us. And continue to be a light to the world as we follow our Savior.
God is good!
No comments:
Post a Comment