So today Bryce and Clark went to dot all the "I's" and cross all the "T's" where Bryce's car is concerned. We didn't stay while the tow truck was loading his car on Saturday. I am thinking now maybe that was key to what happened next.
When they arrived to the impound yard this morning, they were told the car was in Pleasant Grove, not in American Fork, as we'd been told before we left the scene. A bit annoyed, I think, as they were doing this during Clark's work day, they went over to PG and the tow truck driver met them. He told the secretary he'd left the paperwork in his truck. He asked Bryce and Clark to follow him outside. Then he said, "The officer Saturday night told me a bit of what's been going on in your life recently, and I knew if I took your car to AF, or turned in the paperwork here, you would be charged more. So I didn't do either, I wanted to give you a break as well." He proceeded to just charge for the tow...no storage fees! Effectively saving us at the very least, $180! They looked at each other and knew this had been another Tender Mercy.
Bryce has been attending church with us again, his choice not our requirement. Sunday was fast and testimony meeting. (Where anyone in the congregation may share their personal witness of their own beliefs, thus strengthening those listening.) Bryce had told us a week ago that he wanted an opportunity to express his appreciation for all those there who had offered prayers and love on his behalf. However when Sunday morning came, his back was giving him a lot of discomfort, and as we walked in together he said "I may be out here in the foyer if my back is too bad for the chapel seating."
The meeting progressed and I confess I did pray (and others told us they had as well) that he would have the courage to execute his plan...before I knew it we were effectively out of time. After the last individual had spoken, it felt like we were all collectively holding our breath...I thought maybe that was just my imagination, but someone told me later Brother Little had a look of expectancy on his face...it's like he was waiting for something...
Suddenly Bryce quietly unfolded his 6'5" frame and headed to the front. The very air in the room changed. It was if we could have heard a pin drop...on carpet. At first it seemed no one moved. Then simultaneously everyone leaned forward and listened to every word Bryce uttered. Tears leaked from many more than just our eyes. The Spirit was palpable! We all witnessed the very evidence of our faith, the answer to our heartfelt prayers, the living breathing miracle Bryce was to each of us. He spoke bravely, and candidly of how our trials were Heavenly Fathers way of blessing us. He acknowledged God's hand in his life, and expressed gratitude for all our prayers and faith. He then bore a powerful, but sweetly simple testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel and the power of the Book of Mormon.
I gave up trying to dry my tears, I was so proud of him. I understood only a fraction of his courage to do what he'd done, but I also knew a very small portion of the profound respect and joy Heavenly Father would be feeling. Oh how this son continues to take my breath away. I love seeing his very soul. I know a little of his struggle with self-worth, knowing his own weaknesses...but his example makes me want to be better myself! I hope someday, he will come to know himself like I feel I know him, that someday he'll feel more deeply of the love we all have for him, family and stranger alike. For now it's very hard for him to recognize his role in saving his own life that fateful night, just three short weeks ago today. As an addict he tries daily to give the credit to God, because he still doesn't feel worthy of the great blessing he's been given, and he knows the totality of staying humble, and surrendering his will to God's.
He has always had such an irresistible, powerful, magnetic influence on me. When he's in a good place, it's like I cannot not be with him. It's hard to explain but I have experienced it before with him. I know exactly how the Angels feel...they are drawn to him... to love him, to protect him, to lift and encourage him...and yes, even to save him. He's certainly not perfect but to watch him try hour after hour...brings a joy to my soul I didn't know was even possible.
Twice in his earth-life I have walked through the shadow of death with him. Immediately after his birth, and again just recently. Those experiences change a Mother's heart. He hasn't yet read my blog, but many have suggested I need to write a book...so he told me he wanted to write from his perspective before I made my decision about publishing. Today he asked me to read his journal entry....I learned a lot more about him. The thing that he was most surprised at, when he woke up, was how much we all showered him with our love. He was so afraid we- his family- would be mad at him....I don't ever think the memories of seeing his eyes for the first time, or hearing his first words will ever leave the sacred chambers within my heart. They are sweet moments- seared on my soul for eternity. I can honestly say there was never, ever, a solitary nano-second these past weeks, that I wasn't completely grateful to see him choosing life!
I thank my Heavenly Father every single day for him, and my other children, my grandchildren and my sweetheart Clark. Each are precious to me in ways I cannot even verbalize. I am profoundly grateful for the Savior's great plan of happiness, that promises as I continue to keep my covenants, these precious wonderful family will be mine forever! Eternity will be too short to share with each of them!
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